Family problems can sometimes get so intense that we find ourselves going to a place that we have never been before. It can quickly accelerate, especially when one of the family members feels put out.
We see that in the following scenario when a man invited his family into their home, but things didn’t turn out well. His nephew was known for stealing things, and soon, something went missing.
His reaction was to remove his brother and family from the home when things didn’t turn out right. Did he do the right thing? Read his story and you be the judge.
The OP asked if he was in the wrong for, “kicking my brother and his family out after his son stole my engagement ring.” He then went on to explain:
The reason I (26M) know is because I literally caught him in my room going through my things. And it’s on freakin camera. My nephew is 9 and has a habit of stealing things. They’ve gotten in trouble a few times at stores because he’d leave with something in his pockets.
But ofc because he’s a kid they usually just say he forgot he had it. Even at school my brother has told me they have had to come talk to the principal aim a couple occasions. Doesn’t seem like they’ve done anything to stop it.
They had to come stay here with me because my brother lost his job and they weren’t gonna make it with all their bills including rent. He’s doing Uber rn while he searches for a job and they can move out. I didn’t want to because of my nephew specifically but family is family I guess. A month ago I finally bought an engagement ring for my girlfriend that I was planning on proposing to soon but now I don’t know.
It’s a $4k ring that I spent over a year saving up for. It’s been hidden in my room under one of my drawers. One time when I found him snooping in my room I told my brother to control his kid, then got one of those cheap spy cams in my room just incase. Then last week I noticed it was out of its box, after checking the cam it showed he was in there again when I wasn’t home. My brother and his wife have yelled at him.
He says he left it by the tv in the guest room but it’s not there. They looked through all their stuff and his too. I know for a fact he’s lying about not having it because that’s the same thing he said about one of my watches he took then ended up finding it. By the second day my brother tells me they can’t find it at all. And I told him either they find the ring or he repays me the $4k I spent on it, if not they can’t stay here anymore.
My brother got really upset, he told me I know how their situation is right now, and yeah it’s a tough spot but I couldn’t ignore the fact that his kid he can’t parent took something extremely important to me that costed a lot of time and money. They were given a week to leave my house if they don’t find the ring. They’re having to stay at a cheap motel but my brother won’t stop begging to come back because what they’re paying right now each night is coming directly out of their savings. He won’t stop calling me heartless about letting something like this come between helping them out through a difficult time and my nephew keeps saying he’s sorry.
It’s just hard right now to want them around. Don’t even know what to do about the ring and every time I think about it it just makes me so mad that it’s hard to care about their situation. Does that make me an a**hole?
Update 2 – posted today
So many of you have asked nonstop for an update, sorry it took me a while to log back on but lots of stuff have been going on.
Yes I found the ring!! It was a stressful day doing a deeper search in my house trying to think like my nephew and looking in places where I think he’d hide something if he really didn’t want it to be found. And the decision was if it really wasn’t found and my brother wasn’t able to get him to talk, or they wouldn’t be able to pay back what I’m owed then the police would get involved. He did beg me not to but I told him then you better pray I find it or you come up with the money to pay me for it.
Guess both our prayers worked because guess where I found it? In the freaking sink. The SINK. And that’s thanks to the comments who told me to look in those places. Idk what I would’ve done otherwise. It was the sink that was in their guest room, I’m glad he didn’t just throw it away.
You guys don’t know how freaking relieved I was to find it. Took some work to remove the p trap under the sink to get it out but I was just so happy to find it!! Same night my girlfriend (fiancée ) got back I proposed to her and she said yes!! After a nice romantic dinner just the two of us at home… The plan was to wait but after all this s*it I thought, I’m proposing ASAP before anything else happens
After my brother heard about me finding the ring he thought this meant they could come back. I said no. He wanted to argue about this again. All I told him was he’s lucky I haven’t gone to the cops since there was already video evidence of his son taking the ring and there’s no way I’m letting them back in when my nephew wouldn’t even say what he did with the ring. I talked with my nephew myself after I found the ring but he just said he didn’t want to tell anyone because then I’d be mad at him for hiding it. Honestly I just don’t have the energy for them anymore, his problem is their problem and hopefully they get him help before it’s too late.
Only thing important to me is my fiancée and I starting our lives and planning our wedding Thank you Reddit for your help!! Seriously you guys were my life savers
Edit to add: I just received this news after already submitting my post for approval and just wanted to add because I’m so happy, but girlfriend also informed me she’s pregnant!!! She found out while she was on her trip and was waiting for a good time to tell me. Not related to the post but idc, I’m gonna be a dad !!!!